Much Ado About Our Shape

I kind of feel like I could go off the deep end about this, yet I feel the need to rant on it, so bear with me.  My topic of choice is to do with our shape.  Not the actual shape we're in, which is important, but the shape of our bodies.  It seems our society is obsessed with it. Everywhere I look I see articles scrutinizing people for having a bulge here or there that is deemed out of place.  It seems that the "unattractive" extra body baggage warrants more of a comment than something important like the good someone is doing with their life. We put so much pressure on ourselves and others to achieve the perfect body--yet when I stop and think about it, who had the right to decide what was perfect for everyone?  We are all different heights, we all have different hair, eye, and skin colours, so who made the societal rule that we all have to strive to be the same shape? I thought variety was the spice of life.  Don't get me wrong, I am not advocating we all sit around gaining excessive pounds to revolt against the norm.  I just think we should re-think our inner critics.  I always tell my kids that commenting on someone's appearance (other than to compliment them) is unnecessary. We all know our shortcomings, and don't need the words of others to discourage us or otherwise put us down. We can do that for ourselves. As I sit typing this I think of my own "spare tire", but I also think about the fact that my body has served me well up until this point, and hope that it will continue to do so.  I also like to think about the expression about life being a journey, so I am a work-in-progress always, and I can be encouraged to think if I don't like something about myself, there are tons of ways I can go about trying to change, and learning along the way.

My inspiration for this rant was an article I read about how refreshing the writer found it that the Duchess of Cambridge was not "ashamed" to be seen in public sporting a bump post-natal.  My first thought was WTF? She had a baby less than 48 hours previously. Why the hell would anyone expect her to look as she did nine months ago? She just had an almost eight and a half pound human residing inside her.  Look, I don't know where we all got screwed up, but taking from my own experiences, we women are not balloons.  It's not a baby plus air in there. We don't just "pop" and POOF, back to our pre-pregnant size.  Everything is all squishy and tender after our little miracles make their exit. I admit, waterbed belly doesn't look or feel great, but right after having a baby it was the least of my worries anyhow.  I admit as the preggie belly receded, I tried squeezing into old jeans too, but the honest truth was, my innards were still too tender even though I could zip and button.  I agree with the writer, good for Kate that she was confident enough in herself to go before the masses, looking well, pretty darn good.  

While thinking about the whole postpartum look debate, I went back a bit and thought about another shape-related pet peeve I have.  I absolutely HATE when people comment to a pregnant woman using the word FAT.  Damn it people! That hard roundness is not fat!  Maybe the round shape is fooling you, but again from personal experience I can tell you I was not fat, I was pregnant. That means my outline was round because I was home to a developing human being. Some fat may have been involved, but not enough to say that I was fat. Hell, I was TWO people.  If I had my way, no one would be allowed to ever again call a pregnant woman fat.

I just think that we as a species have enough to worry about in this world of ours than what other people feel they have to say about our shape. Just think, not one of us is a perfect specimen in any way, shape, or form. So what gives us the right to make others feel bad about their shortcomings?  I am guilty too, but I have tried to be more mindful, especially thinking about the adages "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all." or "Do unto others as you would have done unto you."  This is something I am trying to instill into my young ones, sometimes without much success, but I will keep plugging at it.  Sure we may not be the right shape by someone else's standards, but if you look, the shape of something else might be just right, like their heart, or their drive, or their attitude. It may be cliche, but my personal goal is to not judge the book by its cover, because you just never know what treasure you might be overlooking if you judge on appearance alone.  I will end with the quote I am fond of... "I am in shape--Round is a shape!"